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This page is designed to provide "Free Recruiting Tips" to student-athletes and their parents. This page will provide articles written by college coaches, "Top Ten Lists", helpful hints and opinions on current issues in college football recruiting. This page will be updated approximately every two weeks. You can be notified of updates to this page by emailing coach@collegefootballscholarship.com and asking to be added to the "Free Recruiting Tips" email list. You will then receive an email with a link to this site when updates occur.
What about Mom and Dad?
By Brian Schwartze
CollegeFootballScholarship.com
copyright 2004
Defining the role of the parent/guardian in the recruiting process is a tricky subject. The amount of parental involvement is unique to each individual situation. There are however some things to keep in mind.
1. This is not your scholarship.
2. You will not be attending college on a football scholarship.
3. The level of play and the size of your son's scholarship, does not determine your worth as a parent.
4. You need to be able to be void of your ego at decision-making time.
5. You need to be able to help your son realize the bottom line with each scholarship offer.
6. Money is not the most important factor all the time.
This would seem to be advice that should be easy to follow, but you would be surprised how many parents lose sight of one or more of these principles.
Below I have compiled a list of parental Do's and Don'ts to help guide you through some of the easier areas as you are getting started in the recruiting process.
DO:
· Talk to recruiters on the phone, ask legitimate questions and do not feel like you have a stupid question. You may want to call the recruiter at a time when your son is away if you do not feel comfortable talking in front of your son.
· Accompany your son on an official visit. You have a right. (Recently proposed NCAA legislation may make this easier by allowing the institution to provide a parent with transportation. This will most likely affect Division I recruits.)
· Encourage a broad search, the perfect fit may be a little further away then you want, the student-athlete or high school coach may look, or the college or university travels to recruit.
· Be proactive in reminding your son about deadlines. Take the lead if you must, but try to push your son to take the lead. If he makes the decision, he is more likely to stay the course when things get rough. At some point in his college career things will get rough.
Don’t:
· Let money be the sole focus of your search.
· Let money be the ultimate deciding factor.
· Tell recruiters how great your son is, they will see the tape, be modest and gracious.
· Assume your son has everything under control.
· Limit his choices to schools close to home.
· Worry about trying to make the perfect decision.
· Haggle too much over money (see The Art of Negotiation, a chapter in my guide).
· Take the recruiters word - Do your own research.
· Wipe his face with a tissue in the middle of the campus tour – be supportive when he needs you, give a gentle push(or kick)in the appropriate area when he needs one, and give him space when he deserves it. Remember this is his time, not your time to recall past glories, make up for missed opportunities or feed your ego.
Knowing exactly the right thing to do as a parent is no easier now than it has been the last 17. Read the lists again and ask yourself if you are acting in the best interest of your son? Are you acting to fulfill his dreams or your own?
The best thing you can do as a parent is to try to educate yourself as much as possible so you can provide guidance when needed. Even though your son may not appear to be interested in your opinion right now, if you do your homework, at some point he will want your help. Good luck.
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